This week’s Friday flash fiction was inspired by my inbox… tediously full of sales emails this morning.
Checking the door was firmly closed, Ardell’s Head of Marketing opened her desk drawer.
She poured herself a hefty slug of bourbon. It had been a stressful few months. Sales at Ardells had suffered and its management team twitched nervously.
“What can we do?” they railed. They lowered prices, they extended opening hours and they employed the pushiest salespeople, incentivising them with impossible targets.
Nothing had worked – and now it was Thanksgiving. She hadn’t even made it home to her family.
Oh well, she might as well put on a sale tomorrow. Call it something.
Black Friday maybe?
“TFIF this week for sure…”
“What happened then, to make Friday so welcome this week?”
“Oh, you know… clients. Demanding ones. Forgetful ones. I had to re-issue three invoices this week.”
“Last Friday wasn’t a great day.”
“Good point. There are a lot of people who won’t recall Fridays with favour for a while.”
“We should re-claim Fridays of course. Show them we are not afraid.”
“Too right! Fridays are when we kick back aren’t they? We go out and we celebrate with our friends and families. We drink and we eat and we laugh.”
Je suis en terrasse.
Pic thanks to Slapix.
This week’s Friday Flash Fiction effort…
THE PANEL 2016
In 2016, a new law was brought in. its jurisdiction was world-wide, but sneakily-worded legislation meant this was not clear.
It boiled down to: Every single comment you make on social media will be analysed by The Panel.
Who the f**k were the panel, wondered those who had noticed the sneaky legislation.
A booming voice: We decide if you are a threat. We know this because social media demonstrates your views perfectly and consistently at all times, and we work out your level of risk to national security.
Worried that you are that stereotype – single woman with cat, drinking wine alone on a Friday? Worry no more… A Japanese company has invented a wine especially for cats, so you can both drink wine together.
Called Nyan Nyan Nouveau, the drink contains juice from Cabernet grapes, vitamin C and catnip. (It doesn’t actually contain alcohol.)
Inspired by this, I created a short story using the characters from my first book. In my first book, friends Katie, Beanie, Chloe, Struan and Matthew have all discovered the most amazing piece of magic. They are deelans, people who can change into cats and have all kinds of other powers.
It’s all very well being able to hunt mice, fall asleep anywhere at any time and being able to jump more than five times your height, but what about other things – say, something a teenager might want to find out..?
Let Matthew tell you the tale…