This one is a little bit naughty… I’ve got a publisher so b****ing about agents and their seemingly impenetrable world is a moot point. However, from time to time, I can’t resist the odd narky comment…

No? No, no no no no no no ad nauseum…

“Dear Ms Birnie, thanks for submitting your manuscript to Expendable Agents Inc. Unfortunately, it doesn’t fit our requirements and you are not a celebrity so we can’t take it any further…”

‘May we take this opportunity to wish you blah blah,’ thought Edie, deleting the message, not bothering with the ‘Many thanks for letting me know’ reply. Nowadays, she figured she didn’t need agents to know she was a nicely brought up gel.

Agent rejection number 25, however, hadn’t reckoned on one thing. Edie lifted the phone – “Ann-Louise, Jane and Rejoice – are you still in the hit woman business…?”